The Golem Fight

A golem. I think I'm spelling that right. I'm not really trained to take on these things, having majored in Calc Studies, so I'm not even really sure what the hell they are. All I know is that it was like 3 storeys tall, built like the Michelin Man but made out of rock, and pissed off.

It was walking down the strip, well, THROUGH the strip, destroying everything it touched. I had only one plan and it wasn't a great one, as Matthews repeatedly let me know. The Bat was useless, of course, so it stayed behind. But I still had my dirtbike and several sticks of dynamite that I'd hauled up from some Calc-ridden crypt. And Matthews had the set-up for the ramp in my van. It was a perfect idea, but it also had to be executed perfectly.

And the plan was to ramp off with the lit dynamite strapped to the bike and hit the golem right in the throat, while I backflipped off the bike to safety. I've been practicing the backflip for a while now (ok, ATTEMPTING the backflip, it's hard to do) so I thought I was ready. I didn't know the timing on the fuses so I just eyeballed it.

Before I jumped, I gave my wallet to Matthews; I'm not sure why. There's not a lot in there but maybe it'd make it easier to identify me afterwards. We set up the ramp ahead of the thing's trail of destruction, so I just had to wait until I got a clear shot. And soon enough, that stony bastard's head was right in my sights. I only lit one stick of dynamite, thinking that the rest would go easy enough. I counted to 5 and then revved the engine.

I was airborne before I knew it and aimed right on the neck. It was perfect. But as I tried to dismount, my pant leg got caught up on the kickstand, so I was fighting that in free fall. I managed to get free but now I was just flying straight at the rock monster's crotch. I curled up into a little ball but still hit it pretty hard. And the bike was right behind me as I fell to the ground. I'd aimed it up dead on, apparently, but mis-timed the fuses. They were still lit and ready to blow as the bike landed right next to me.

I'm not sure exactly what happened next but I woke up in the sewer. I guess I rolled into a grate. Afterwards, I learned that the blast took out the bastard's legs and he fell over, so part of my plan worked. But then it just kept on crawling through the city until some other Adventurers finished it off with backhoes and bulldozers. Should've thought of that.

Live and learn. Earned enough from the city to finish paying off that old bike and start paying off a new one.